please come you make the beer taste better
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Every concussion has its silver lining
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Randomize
