Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
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