listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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