So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
Randomize
