Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
