She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
An open call to all exes! i have a drunk text policy that requires i delete any and all texts after drink 3, however i have reason to believe i have done something stupid. if i have texted you that "I love you", "miss you" and/or conveyed any interest in getting back together with you in the last 24 hours i was belligerent and lying. That is all.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Randomize