well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Randomize
