big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Randomize
