I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
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