I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Randomize
