For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
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