what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
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