So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
Randomize
