Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
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