oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
i came on her dog
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
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