Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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