with your own penis?
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
