OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Randomize
