He disabled his match.com account in front of me
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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