So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
