I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
