you guys were way drunker than both of me
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
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