i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize
