well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
Everclear isn't food dammit
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
