Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
