He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize
