I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Randomize
