Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
Randomize
