THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
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