We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
