is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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