I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
