he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Randomize
