She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Randomize
