is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize
