Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
