He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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