im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
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