just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Randomize
