I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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