Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I still have a little drunk in my system
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
