OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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