Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
Someone came in the potted fern
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
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