Can Purell be used as lube?
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
I have feelings that need drinking.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
Randomize
