you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
Randomize
