the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
