So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
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