if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize
