FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
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