so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
